Let us be lovers, We'll marry our fortunes together...

{Now Playing: Tracks in the Snow by The Civil Wars}

I have loved you with an everlasting love...
Jeremiah 31:3a

Snowflakes float blissfully outside of my window. Isn’t it beautiful, the peace that snow carries just on the outside of glass windows, surrounded by family and comforts (mine being a V-Day themed cup full of piping hot English Breakfast, a knitting project in progress with the most luxurious bulky yarn imaginable, My Last Day Without You to watch later on, and reruns with Mom).

Last Thursday, whilst meandering through Barnes & Noble during my lunch hour, I discovered a book called The Dress Shop of Dreams by Menna Van Praag. There’s nothing better than a magical, lighthearted romance to read with tea, and a blanket on the day of love (and let me tell you, I’m on chapter 4 and it is lovely!). On the bus ride home, I was struck by this quote: “When a woman needs courage, for example, life might throw a few things at her to draw it out. When a woman needs to love herself, she might be lonely while life leaves her without external hearts to hide in.” It’s not the loneliness that resonates with me, after all, the absence of a relationship does not mean loneliness because if we really think about it, we’re surrounded by love everyday. But what resonated with me is the beauty that God will, many times, leave you without the thing you believe tethers you to the earth. The distraction that, one, keeps you from your most important romance with Him, and two, your next great romance with yourself.

It hurts sometimes to think of having to part with the things that provide an ephemeral hiding place from fully accepting myself. I’ve relied on these things for so long, and the thought of just being in a room with my own breath sounding in the silence, and the still and jarring Words of Jesus scares me a little. But I’m also a bit relieved that I have the wonderful opportunity with every year, to finally discover more about myself, and to  allow the Lord to secure me so that I no longer rely so heavily on the distractions. I think everyone dreams of being loved by someone who can see them with unflorished eyes, and love them, and now I’m thinking instead of wishing that somoene else might come in and help you see yourself in a new way, it’s up to us to see what’s delightful about us before anyone else will see it. There’s a very thin line between standing strong, and falling prey to the ebbs and flows of another’s moods and opinions of you.

That’s my hope for you today. That you would take a step back and think of what makes you absolutely awesome. And if you don’t feel it, that’s okay...that’s just the start. Love on yourself today. Treat yourself to flowers, or you-time, or a dinner, or something else that makes you happy. Affirm yourself with God’s Word, and allow yourself to start believing that you are royalty, you are brave, you can accomplish anything through Him, and most importantly you are loved. 

Let this love that’s only found in Him radiate through your heart onto someone else, and pass the beauty of self love around. 

And for a little romantic break:

tabi no tame